Halftime Report

I’ve reached the halfway mark and it’s finally starting to get good. Why is that? Why is it that whenever I really start to fully understand and enjoy where it is that I am and what I’m doing, the end seems to be a mere few feet away?

The past three weeks here at Compassion have been some of the sweetest times in my life. As cliché as it may seem, I feel as though I have found myself. Or better yet, I found the Lord. Not to say He was hiding, but I feel as though my eyes have been unveiled and my heart has been opened to see and experience Him in a new way.

As with any halftime, the focal point has now turned from offense to defense. We have successfully created an idea that I think will be huge hit and now we need to find a way to defend it against the onslaught of logistics, financial resources and all other realistic killjoys. This is where it gets interesting.

Interesting also is the possibility of staying here at Compassion. I have recently applied for several positions which I am praying the Lord will make available. In His faithfulness, I know that He has prepared a place and purpose for me and so I am trying to wait in patient faith for Him to open the doors He wants, where He wants, when He wants.

I am surprised at my intense desire to stay here, not only at Compassion but in Colorado Springs. I have never been the kind to stray far from home, venture into uncharted water, or do anything on my own. Ironically enough, this internship has encapsulated all of those very things.

Colorado Springs is a long day’s drive from Texas. Working in general, while inevitable, was not something that was familiar to me. Most significantly, coming out here by myself, with no one to meet me at the airport, was never something anyone in my family ever thought I might agree to. Perhaps the story of my journey here would help to highlight why I went against every instinct I had.

I was flying back to school after a much-needed Christmas break. I boarded my flight in Denver after a quick layover and was headed back to Virginia for the last semester of my college career. The weight of reality had begun to set in over the break and I was anxious, to say the least, about how my life would pan out after I walked across the stage.

As I sat gazing out the window, I decided it would be better to talk to a perfect stranger than to be alone with my own thoughts.

“Where are you going?” I asked the woman sitting next to me.

“I’m going on a cruise with my Bible study who is also on this flight,” she responded as she sipped her coffee.

As the conversation progressed naturally, she informed me that she worked in the HR department at Compassion International. “You have got to be kidding me,” I thought to myself.

Somewhat jokingly, I asked her if I could send her my resume since I would soon be graduating and was in need of a job. “Sure,” she replied kindly and gave me her contact information.

When my plane touched down in Virginia I darted to my car, raced to my dorm, and took two stairs at a time in order to e-mail her all the necessary information.

Resume. Check. Letters of reference. Check.

Shortly thereafter, I received an e-mail from her informing me that they were piloting an internship program this summer and that it would be a wonderful opportunity to get a glimpse of Compassion and get my foot in the door. I applied on a Friday night. A few weeks and two phone interviews later, I committed to spending six weeks of my summer interning in a land far, far away.

The journey here has been one of refinement to say the least. But having shed the layers of worry, fear and uncertainty and put on robes of peace, patience and hope, I am learning daily how to walk humbly with my God.

Job offer or not, this internship has changed me. I don’t know that I qualify as a “grown-up”, but I am not the child I was before. Your prayers would be much appreciated as I wait to see where the Lord will lead.

4 Comments |Add a comment

  1. Meredith July 30, 2008

    Wow ladies! Thank you so much for your encouragement and love. I can not tell you just how much you bless me. Please know that I truly appreciate and value your comments and the time you take to read the post and write you thoughts. You are why I love doing this!

  2. Vicki Small July 29, 2008

    Meredith, I can well understand an intense desire to stay in Colorado Springs, and at Compassion. After a too-brief couple of days there in January, my leaving to return home felt like a wrenching I had not fully expected. I am married to the world’s very best husband and love our life together. But going to Compassion conferences is like a family reunion, for me–the good kind–and being at the GMC just deepened that sense. I had an intense desire to stay there. Just give me a place to lay out a comfy mattress, sleeping bag and pillow, and I’ll just camp out in the GMC! Really, it’s more like being closer to heaven.

    I may be projecting my own experience onto you, but I sense something of the same feeling behind your words. But I strongly suspect the Holy Spirit is very much involved, and I pray with you that His path for you will be revealed…preferably sooner than later, huh!

  3. Juli Jarvis July 29, 2008

    I agree. You have a really good way with words. I love your spirit and passion. I can’t wait to hear the rest of the story…

  4. Lindy July 29, 2008

    I love your writing, I love the lessons you have been learning this summer! In my opinion, you are just the kind of person who should be working there at Compassion! I’m praying for God’s perfect choice for your future!

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