Since we met last, progression on the program has been both productive and sluggish.

Productive in that meetings are set, conversations have been had, and a “plan of action” has been made so that strategic and tactical steps can be taken. 

In the same way, it seems as though little has been accomplished because those all important meetings are not scheduled until later this month to the availability of personnel who have extensive traveling schedules. Unfortunately, patience is not a virtue I possess. 

The conversations, though, have provided the encouragement and affirmation I have needed. Let’s start with the most exciting one.

Compassion Experience Director Scott Barnes has hopped on board with Curtis Fletcher and myself and has been a great help in making contact with field countries. I have met with him on a number of occasions to discuss potential countries that would be open to the idea of our program.

About a week ago, he e-mailed a director in a country of interest to ask them to prayerfully consider coming on board with us and accepting the invitation to be the pilot country for the program. Scott said we would hear from them in a couple of weeks.

A few days later, we received a phone call from the country director saying that he loved the idea and wanted to be a part of it. He’s all in. I don’t know how else to say it, but this is kind of a big deal. 

Then there is the other conversation . . . the one about me.

Curtis, Chris and I had a meeting in my office (and by office I mean cube) to discuss where I belong and to whom I belong. Because Chris has his plate full with “web stuff,” and the web component of this program is only a small fraction of the program’s overall reach, there is only so much guidance and assistance that he can continue to give with regards to this program. 

This means that that the program is more technically a “project,” which now places the program — as well as myself – under Curtis’s supervision. This is good news. Let me explain why.

In terms of finding a potential, more permanent home here at Compassion, there isn’t an open position within the web team. While I love this team dearly, continuing in it would not be conducive to running the program.

However, coming under the supervision and department of Curtis would allow me to continue working on the project as well as a few other items that my skills may be better suited for. 

In addition, Curtis is looking to hire about four new positions over the course of the next several months. Optimistically, should the program be successful after the test and is made a yearly event, a full-time position would be needed to maintain it. 

Enter your’s truly.

None of this is a guarantee. I’m well aware of that. But what makes it such a blessing is that I am wanted here. Chris, Curtis, and others want to see me stay here; they want the project to be successful, and they are advocating for me to be a part of it. That is a priceless feeling. 

Working closely with Curtis has been a tremendous honor. He is brilliant without being arrogant and has taken ownership and control of the project without being domineering. There are still elements that are intimidating to me, his rank being one of them. 

But he has been more than a superior. He has been a wonderful teacher. He has taken time out of his schedule, which is normally booked, to get to know me, challenge me, and encourage me. He is a great listener, and a kind counselor. Best of all is his sense of humor, which has impeccable timing.    

Knowing him has been an honor in and of itself. Working with him is a privilege. I’m looking forward to the months to come.

I’ll keep you posted. 

On a side note, I have recently created my own personal blog and would love for you to visit! I would like to get to know you and would enjoy the opportunity to read your blogs as well.

My Account l Sponsor a Child l Help Babies and Moms l Crisis Updates

Here’s another question for you: Remember how I started out as an intern? (I really hope you are nodding your head up and down at the moment.)

Since the internship program was so successful last summer (and by last summer I mean three months ago) we are now beginning the process of promoting the 2009 internship program.

There are more differences than similarities this time around, and they are all for the best. When I began blogging at the start of the internship, I didn’t say much about the logistical set-up of the program, so allow me to fill you in.

I applied for the internship in mid-March, had a couple of phone interviews and was selected in mid-May. All was fine and dandy; I had a short-term, future plan. And then my parents asked, “Where are you going to live?”

Dang it. Minor detail.

Like everything else, the Lord opened doors, and living arrangements came together like peanut-butter and jelly. I’m hungry as I am writing, so excuse the lame metaphor.

As you can imagine, I was not the not the only intern that faced this “where to live” dilemma. That was hurdle number one.

Other hurdles included transportation; some interns didn’t have cars. Obviously, we all took turns and made up a car pool system of sorts, like little soccer moms. While it was an obstacle that was easily overcome, it was something that had not been entirely prepared for either. And considering gas prices in July, it was a slightly expensive act of love.

Speaking of expenses, unlike most internships, we were paid. And more than minimum wage.

Believe it or not, I am grateful for all of these little facts. Without them, I would have not seen as clearly the provision and hand of God. Without the distraction of simplicity and ease and, dare I say even comfort, I would have been blind to God’s goodness and grace. For it alone is more than enough.

Needless to say, there have been changes made to the 2009 edition of the internship. Let’s take a look, shall we?

Here’s a little bit about the program.

For starters, the biggest alteration comes with the overall length of the internship. Instead of a six week stint beginning in July, the new internship will begin May 25 and will end ten weeks later on July 31.

This is a change that I think will contribute to an overall improvement in terms of the ability to learn more while at Compassion and will allow the intern to inevitably accomplish more.

Another big change (improvement) is that Compassion will be providing housing arrangements for those who need it. Compassion will be asking employees and members of our local church partners to prayerfully consider opening their homes to interns.

Considering that ten weeks is . . . well, ten weeks, the interns will be required to make a one time payment to the family that they live with in order to offset any extra cost incurred during their stay. I think that it is not only fair to the family, but that it encourages financial responsibility on the part of the intern.

Oh my word! I sound like my Dad.

There are still other changes.

During my internship experience, Fridays were non-work days. Instead of working in the office we dedicated ourselves to community service.

Every Friday we went, as a group, to a different ministry organization within Colorado Springs that needed help in some way. We did everything from painting, cleaning, cooking, stuffing envelopes and much more. This day was completely unpaid. And perhaps the most rewarding day of the week.

For the ’09 internship, Fridays can be spent in one of three ways: working in the office, volunteering, or taking the day off completely.

There is one other major change that I believe will be a huge attraction: an optional, one week trip to Mexico to visit several different child development centers. The trip will not be paid for by Compassion; the bill will be footed by the student.

I think that this is a brilliant idea. Giving a student the opportunity to see what they are working for is an awesome way to connect the dots. My prayer is that not only will every student be able to take the trip, but that they will also not have to fight the emotional disconnect that I harbor. God, in His limitless grace and infinite wisdom, has been softening my heart and granting me better understanding in this area as of late.

Applications will be available on November 17, 2008.

The deadline for applying is January 15, 2009.

Learn a little bit more about the internship’s eligibility requirements and details. And if you know someone who may be interested in applying, please spread the word! Thanks.

As always, I covet your prayers.

My Account l Sponsor a Child l Help Babies and Moms l Crisis Updates

After a number of revisions, I presented the business case to Rick Davis, the head of the marketing department. Remember him? His approval and support is crucial . . . and we have it.

The meeting went well; questions had answers, investment costs were justified, and the next steps head forward. Forward to another conference room in front of the child sponsorship program cabinet.

This process may seem as though it’s being drawn out, but in fact, I’m encouraged. I’m at the final step — a presentation to the decision makers from throughout the company who determine how resources are allocated in regards to our country staff and the child sponsorship program.

There’s a glitch though.

The presentation is October 10 at noon. And on October 10 at noon I will be back in Texas helping my friend stay calm and sane before she walks the aisle of matrimony the next morning.

Ironic? Possibly. But probably not. The Lord apparently has something else in mind.

Believe it or not, I’m not upset that I can’t present — I don’t have the right to be that selfish. The creation of the campaign and the progress I have made thus far have all been outside of my own ability or direction anyway. No reason to claim it now. If anything, getting to see it unfold, to witness God move how He wants, when He wants, is more fun.

Knowing that its success is wholly dependent on the Lord’s will and allowance assures me that I can rest confidently in the project’s achievement. No matter when that may be.

In other news, I heard back from HR about the position that I applied for. They gave it to another girl they felt was better qualified. It is an awesome answer to prayers. Let me tell you why.

Thursday, the day before, I was talking with Curtis Fletcher, and I told him that I had applied for the job. He looked at me and asked, “Do you really want that job?”

“Yes.” I replied. “I think I could do it, and I think it would be a good learning experience.”

Apparently I am not very convincing because he looked at me and repeated his question and sure enough I had a different answer. “Sure . . . maybe. I don’t know.”

Friday morning, as I sat in my car in the parking lot, I prayed that the Lord would make it apparent what He would have me to do. I asked Him to speak loud and clear, and to tell me in some form or fashion if I were to accept the position if it was offered.

I know myself pretty well, and I knew that if I were offered the position, even if it wasn’t what I wanted, I would accept out of fear of security and longevity here at Compassion.

I got out of my car, made my way to my office, and answered a phone call about an hour later. “We have given the position to someone else.”

Pretty clear, wouldn’t you say? I’m grateful I didn’t have to come to that conclusion on my own, either. I’m terribly indecisive.

My Account l Sponsor a Child l Help Babies and Moms l Crisis Updates

Last week was quite the whirlwind. But oh the productivity! Let me just tell you, we’re moving forward! As you may remember, after delivering the business proposal at the end of my internship, I was asked to write up a business case. For all intents and purposes, the business case is simply a shorter, more-to-the-point version of the proposal that will be delivered to the higher-ups for approval and funding.

I can hardly believe it, but I think it’s going to happen. My idea may be funded. Thanks to your prayers. Special thanks and recognition go out to a gentleman by the name of Curtis Fletcher. I met him last week when Chris set up a 90 minute meeting with him to get his insight and opinion on the business case.

When I walked into the conference room he was already there, nearly ten minutes early, reading/highlighting/taking notes on the draft of the case that I had e-mailed him.

He is every bit of 6 feet, 4 inches, probably taller. He has the build of professional football player: broad, thick, and intimidating. When I walked in, he peered over his glasses with big blue eyes and said “Hello.”

Shockingly, his voice was soft and kind, and a smile broke the concentrated look on his face. Suddenly I felt a little less small.

The meeting went very well. He works closely with those to whom I am writing, and his vantage point helped to enlighten my approach. Finally, I had some clarity on what to say and how to say it.

The biggest answer to prayer came when, at the end of the meeting, Mr. Fletcher offered to help redraft it. “My door is open. Whatever you need, I’ll help you.”

I wish you could have been there because I have a feeling my face said it all. I tend to wear my heart on my sleeve. I don’t remember what I said, but I remember what I felt. Sweet relief.

With a clarified direction, and the assistance of someone who knows what he is doing, I had a surge of excitement and inspiration. Back to the drawing board I went the next morning and into his office shortly thereafter.

Sure enough, his door was open and his welcome was warm. After some impromptu meetings and even more e-mails, the draft is complete and will be on its way to . . . I-don’t-know-who, tomorrow.

Needless to say, last week was the encouragement that I needed. Call me crazy, but sometimes my faith dwindles when there seems to be a stagnant or presumably idle period of time when, despite work, there is no progress. Can anyone relate? Anyone? Bueller?

Praise report: My “on-call” status has been renewed until the end of October! I am so grateful for the opportunity to stay on board here and to continue working on the campaign. Thank you for your prayers, as I know many of you have kept me in mind. It means the world to me, and I am truly thankful.

Prayer request: I recently had two interviews (for the same position) within the marketing department. I interviewed for the “Advocates Network Assistant” position. I’m excited about the potential and think that it is a position that I would both enjoy and be good at. I was the first of five interviewees. I should know by the end of this week if I get it.

No matter what, I know God is in control and that His plan, whether I see it or not, is good and perfect. He is sovereign, He is faithful, and He is the perfect provider. I am learning to rest in Him, trust in Him, and above all else, abide in Him.

My Account l Sponsor a Child l Help Babies and Moms l Crisis Updates

And what I thought was powerful and moving at lunch barely compared to what I experienced on Friday. In fact, it didn’t compare at all.

As the kids took the stage, the lighting was almost dimmed by the luminosity of their smiles; they began singing, much like they did Monday at lunch, and despite the different setting, their energy and enthusiasm was unchanged.

The intensity of their voices and the authenticity of their faith, joy, and gratitude were unchanged. Impervious. And that wasn’t even the inspiring part.

The last song they performed was a ballad, a deeply captivating song about children in poverty. The words alone moved me to tears, but hearing it sung by children in poverty was almost unbearable.

The lyrics were written from an outsider’s perspective, but they were sung by those inside the circumstance. As the children sang, I pictured them securely resting in the arms of our Lord as He looked down on family and friends and asked the same question we all ask: Why?

The performance caused goose-bumps to erupt up and down my arms. As they sang the chorus one last time, instead of singing about “other children,” they sang about themselves. And in addition to thanking God for His love, they thanked us, the audience, for our support and provision.

As moving and inspiring as it all was, nothing compared with how it ended.

As they stood, singing, several girls started crying. Not just one glistening tear. They began to sob. Shoulders heaving and little bodies convulsing. It was like a domino effect.

I think I went into spiritual shock. I couldn’t move, couldn’t blink. I could only absorb . . . and it was overwhelming.

I have always considered myself to be a somewhat mature Christian, having gone through my valley and mountain top spiritual seasons and coming out stronger and wiser for it. I thought I understood the grace and love of God. I thought I had some idea of the desperate dependence that the Lord calls us to live in daily, carrying our crosses and following His lead. I thought I had tasted His sovereignty and His provision. And for all of it, I have considered myself grateful and thankful for all those things.

But I discovered that my gratitude was about as deep as a kiddy pool compared to the spiritual depth and experience that I saw emerge from the hearts of those children.

I am going to go out on a limb and say that very few of us (if any) have ever been in a position in which meals were not guaranteed on a daily basis or our friend’s livelihood was not guaranteed when the sun came up. That a parent’s ability to provide was a prayer and not a promise. As much as I wanted to identify with these kids, I could not.

The reason we had nothing in common was because their gratitude poured forth from hearts that were grateful for spiritual life and the salvation of their souls.

They were grateful that they didn’t feel sick that day, that their families were being helped by Compassion. They were grateful because their sponsors loved them and cared enough to send $32 a month. They were grateful because gratitude was all they had to give.

How many of us want to be that grateful? Harder still, how many of us are willing to learn how to be that grateful?

If you want to know and have the gratitude that those children had, be prepared to understand why they have it. It is all that they have. The lives they lead are not radical; they are Biblical.

Where does your devotion lie?

Who or what holds the keys to your heart? Your joy? Your peace?

The only thing I truly know is this: when we have been brought to our knees at the foot of the cross, every hindrance aside, not only is our gratitude more pure and undefiled, but we are in the perfect place to receive His grace.

I want to rest there. Will you come with me?

My Account l Sponsor a Child l Help Babies and Moms l Crisis Updates

When I walked into the New Delhi Café (get it?), I was startled to see most of our tables occupied by little boys and girls . . . FROM AFRICA! A group of about ten kids, roughly eight to twelve years old, from Tanzania were all sitting down having lunch and drinking Cokes. They were bright-eyed, big smiled, beautiful kids.

As I filed in with many others for what we thought would be a normal lunch, I overheard someone say that they were all Compassion sponsored children.

“What an awesome reminder,” I thought to myself. “I’m working for them, their friends, and families.” Despite the fact that they were all well and healthy, I still found myself pitying them because they had to be “sponsored.”

But then, all of the sudden, they stood up, gathered together, started swaying in unison . . . and started singing.

I have never heard anything like it. Besides being on perfect key, they sang in harmony with one another. I can’t begin to tell you just how moving it was to listen to them to sing praises to the Lord. More powerful than their voices, though, were their hearts behind it.

As they sang and swayed, they all either had their eyes closed or their eyes wide open and hands raised to heaven. I never knew the power of a child’s faith until that moment.

And yet these are not just any children.

They are from parts of the world and circumstances that, from my perspective, would hardly move me to recognize and respond to God. The beauty and conviction for me lay in the fact their faith was not based upon their homeland or family circumstance.

Their faith and reason for worship was based on the condition and circumstance of their heart. I then realized it was not them who were in need or pity, but me.

While I appear healthy, I am actually quite diseased. I have the disease of greed, materialism, and — worst of all — selfishness. Things that have manifested themselves and festered not from need but overabundance. At some point, I don’t recall when, those thingsthat which were provisional blessings from the Lord stopped being blessings and became entitlements, in my mind.

As I sat listening to the kids singing “We worship you Lord, for you are good,” my heart broke. They sing those words because they know His goodness and faithfulness in another way: the provision they receive is unknown day to day, but still it comes.

Their gratitude stems from hearts that do not expect what they receive; rather, they are grateful because they know they can not provide for themselves, and so in the midst of their dependence, they are humbled. But they are not ashamed.

On the other side of the world lies another mindset completely.

In stark contrast, I find myself thinking and feeling as though I deserve all that I have. And the magnitude of my gratitude is dependent on how productive I am at work or how good my service was at the restaurant of my choice.

The bigger issue is the state of our hearts (I’m taking the liberty of speaking for all us, hope you don’t mind). Instead of rejoicing in our inability to provide for ourselves in the way that our souls need, we are afraid to be dependent on anyone, so we choose to be dependent on things. We are afraid to ask for help and receive assistance. In our culture, the only glory is in being self-sustaining.

Isn’t it ironic that even when we are successful in this, we still feel like failures?

As the kids continued singing, I found myself wishing I was more like them. Free from the world but enslaved to Christ.

My Account l Sponsor a Child l Help Babies and Moms l Crisis Updates

I was reading through chapter three this morning and came across something that gave me a hope and excitement about the future that I have really been praying for. Starting in verse nine, he is recalling that during the time of Moses, the law, which was death, was considered glorious because it was from God. But now, the law has been abolished, and grace, which is life, has replaced it.

In verse ten he says,

“…What once had glory has come to have no glory because of the glory that surpasses it (emphasis mine). For if what was being brought to an end came with glory, how much more will what is permanent have glory.” (ESV)

As you know, my internship at Compassion has ended and I am still here (praise the Lord) working as a temp in hopes of being hired on full time. The internship was to me, very glorious. It was a six week period of my life filled with the realization of God’s goodness, provision, and sovereignty in ways that I had not seen or known.

While I still work here and am grateful to do so, there is a strange sense of reality and life that has suddenly set in. I have recently moved into my first apartment, am paying my own bills, and this feeling of independence that I have longed for and strived to attain is now creating in me a greater desire to be dependent again.

I think that’s the point. Not to say that everything you thought you wanted in life will disappoint, but those things that we counted as glorious will, in fact, pale in comparison to what the Lord has prepared for those who love Him. As He progressively sanctifies us and makes us more like Himself, the greatness of the former glories will dim and the places that He will take us in the future will be even more glorious.

The thing about “glories” is that they come in between waves of seeming stillness. For example, I recently applied for a waitressing position at PF Chang’s. I am one of only two people I know that loves to serve at restaurants. Since I’m new to the area, I thought it would be a great way to stay busy, meet people, and earn a little extra money. I have quite a bit of experience and felt confident that when I walked in a few weeks ago, I would be training by the end of the week.

Two weeks and four interviews later, Corporate has put the restaurant on a “hiring freeze” because September is their slowest month. Bad timing. Stillness.

I have also continued applying at Compassion for any and every position for which I qualify. The response … *crickets chirping* Silence. Stillness. And so I continue to wait.

As I am waiting, I am working on a number of different assignments. For starters, I was asked to sift through hundreds of pictures and video clips dealing with the Global Food Crisis and to come up with a creative way in which to use them to communicate the depth of the problem.

Due to some unexpected technical difficulties and unfortunate time delays, I am now about a week and half behind. More stillness.

After a great “next steps” meeting with the head of marketing, I have been asked to write a more formal and “buttoned-up” business case for the my campaign idea to quantify the benefits and cost. This is what the decision-makers will use to say “go” or “no go.” Potential stillness.

It only makes sense that there must be times of stillness, even silence, perhaps in order for there to be times of proper praise, worship, and gratitude. If we have nothing to compare our former glories to, we would begin to think of our God as small and limited. In His wisdom, He reveals to us glimpses into His splendor, satisfying us only so much as to feed the yearning and desire of our heart to want more.

So, while I work and wait, and wait and work, I feel the Spirit building up within me a hope for a future glory. My hope and prayer for you, no matter where you are or what you are doing, is that you would also come to know and feel that God is preparing to show you another measure of His glory so that you would be refreshed and satisfied. But only for a little while.

The God of the universe loves us too much to let us settle for what we can see and understand. What a greater love though, that would continue, daily, to romance us and to lead us to a secret place, filled with greater glory than we can begin to comprehend. This is our God: the romancer of our spirits and the lover of our souls. Be swept away, won’t you?

My Account l Sponsor a Child l Help Babies and Moms l Crisis Updates

On August 14 I gave a presentation for “the proposal” I worked on during my internship. By the grace of God, it was received very well. Various department heads were there, including the marketing director himself, and they all liked the idea. A lot. In fact, they liked it so much, the first question was “What are our next steps?”

I was speechless.

My supervisor, Chris Giovagnoni, filled in my silence. “Uhhh …”

Good call Chris. Way to cover.

Shortly after the presentation, I debriefed with Chris. What he then told me only led to yet another level of amazement and surprise.

How would you feel about working with us for another six weeks? You’d be doing different stuff since you completed your internship project, but you’d still be involved with the ‘next step’ discussions. And we’d buy you some time, free of the ‘what do I do now’ question, as Human Resources considers all the candidates for the positions you’ve applied for.”

“Uhhh, yes.”

Let me paint a picture for you.

The night before, I was lying on my back on the floor of my room in tears as I spoke with my mom about my doubt and fears for the future.

“What if I am not supposed to be in Colorado or with Compassion at all?” I sobbed.

“What if my time here is done? Where will I go now? How am I supposed to know what to do?”

God was in control and His timing was perfect … yet again. He made it clear where He wanted me and what He wanted me to be doing the next day, the day of the internship graduation.

Would I have been better off knowing I would be staying days or even weeks before? Not necessarily.

The only thing that would have changed would have been my desperate dependence on Him. I would have begun to take over control of the next steps and, if memory serves me right, I typically screw things up.

So what seemed to be hard and uncomfortable test of faith was actually the Lord’s way of saving me from myself in the long run. It has painted for me a more real and tangible picture of His grace.

So here I sit; in my same cube at my same desk, happy as a lark.

*Furrowed brow*

What is a lark and why is it happy?

My Account l Sponsor a Child l Help Babies and Moms l Crisis Updates

Despite the fact that there are only three days left in this work week, it feels as though there is two weeks worth of work to be done. I will be putting the finishing touches on the proposal today and will be presenting it to the marketing “big-wigs” on Thursday.

The presentation is weighing heavily on my mind for a number of different reasons. For starters, it will be the first, and potentially only, chance that I have in front of such an influential audience here at Compassion.

Secondly, I simply want to do well. This project is close to my heart and I want to do it justice. I don’t just want to sell it. I want to inspire my audience to feel as passionately about it as I do and see the vision that I have for it. I don’t want them to merely associate this proposal with “the intern’s project,” but instead I want them to think that “this is where Compassion could go; this is what Compassion should do.”

While there are other matters that seem to float aimlessly around in my thoughts, the most important and imperative at the moment is the question of my immediate future. I have applied for several positions here at Compassion, but as of today, have yet to hear back. And waiting patiently is not my forte.

As is usually the case, the Lord revealed a scripture to me last week that has brought some much needed comfort and strength. In Isaiah 43:18-19 it says “Forget the former things, do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! … I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland” (NIV).

I don’t think we give God enough credit for being creative in terms of humor. Let me explain.

A few weeks ago, while driving towards Denver, I made the comment to my friends that the terrain of Colorado was surprising in that it was much dryer and less lush than I envisioned it to be.

“That’s because this is desert land,” Molly said.

“But there are mountains,” I replied.

She half laughed. “There can still be mountains in desert lands,” she informed me kindly.

Not to be completely outsmarted, I Googled “Colorado topography” later that evening. Sure enough, the entire eastern portion of the state lies within the borders of the “great plains,” a large, high-plains region known for its dry, arid climate and lack-luster vegetation.

So what does Colorado topography have to do with my future?

In case you haven’t seen the weather channel, it has been raining here for the past week straight. This desert land has been recently refreshed. Standing water can been seen in the deep ravines by the highways, an uncommon occurrence here, especially during this time of year.

In the same way that the Lord rains down life and renewal to the earth in its time of need, so too does He promise to reign down the blessing of His perfect provision in our time of need as well.

I don’t know what door He will open in the coming weeks. I don’t know where He will lead me to work or what He will lead me to do. But I do know that in the midst of my Moses-like desert experience, He will bring forth water from the rocks and manna from the heaven.

In church this past Sunday, my pastor finished a sermons series on the twenty-third chapter of Psalms. In the last verse, David says that “surely goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life” (ESV).

The terms “goodness” and “mercy” will all mean different things to different people based upon their circumstances and what the Lord wants to show them individually. However, the universal message is this: surely they will come to all of us. Surely, Will, and All. Three big words. One big promise.

For those who have journeyed with me, thank you. I will continue to keep you posted on how things are going. Your company, comments, and words of encouragement have brought peace, joy, and hope that I can not begin to describe. My hope is that you continue to walk with Him, seek Him, and know Him more everyday. And if you find yourself in the desert one day, I pray that He would grant you the strength of faith to wait patiently for the rain.

My Account l Sponsor a Child l Help Babies and Moms l Crisis Updates

The past three weeks here at Compassion have been some of the sweetest times in my life. As cliché as it may seem, I feel as though I have found myself. Or better yet, I found the Lord. Not to say He was hiding, but I feel as though my eyes have been unveiled and my heart has been opened to see and experience Him in a new way.

As with any halftime, the focal point has now turned from offense to defense. We have successfully created an idea that I think will be huge hit and now we need to find a way to defend it against the onslaught of logistics, financial resources and all other realistic killjoys. This is where it gets interesting.

Interesting also is the possibility of staying here at Compassion. I have recently applied for several positions which I am praying the Lord will make available. In His faithfulness, I know that He has prepared a place and purpose for me and so I am trying to wait in patient faith for Him to open the doors He wants, where He wants, when He wants.

I am surprised at my intense desire to stay here, not only at Compassion but in Colorado Springs. I have never been the kind to stray far from home, venture into uncharted water, or do anything on my own. Ironically enough, this internship has encapsulated all of those very things.

Colorado Springs is a long day’s drive from Texas. Working in general, while inevitable, was not something that was familiar to me. Most significantly, coming out here by myself, with no one to meet me at the airport, was never something anyone in my family ever thought I might agree to. Perhaps the story of my journey here would help to highlight why I went against every instinct I had.

I was flying back to school after a much-needed Christmas break. I boarded my flight in Denver after a quick layover and was headed back to Virginia for the last semester of my college career. The weight of reality had begun to set in over the break and I was anxious, to say the least, about how my life would pan out after I walked across the stage.

As I sat gazing out the window, I decided it would be better to talk to a perfect stranger than to be alone with my own thoughts.

“Where are you going?” I asked the woman sitting next to me.

“I’m going on a cruise with my Bible study who is also on this flight,” she responded as she sipped her coffee.

As the conversation progressed naturally, she informed me that she worked in the HR department at Compassion International. “You have got to be kidding me,” I thought to myself.

Somewhat jokingly, I asked her if I could send her my resume since I would soon be graduating and was in need of a job. “Sure,” she replied kindly and gave me her contact information.

When my plane touched down in Virginia I darted to my car, raced to my dorm, and took two stairs at a time in order to e-mail her all the necessary information.

Resume. Check. Letters of reference. Check.

Shortly thereafter, I received an e-mail from her informing me that they were piloting an internship program this summer and that it would be a wonderful opportunity to get a glimpse of Compassion and get my foot in the door. I applied on a Friday night. A few weeks and two phone interviews later, I committed to spending six weeks of my summer interning in a land far, far away.

The journey here has been one of refinement to say the least. But having shed the layers of worry, fear and uncertainty and put on robes of peace, patience and hope, I am learning daily how to walk humbly with my God.

Job offer or not, this internship has changed me. I don’t know that I qualify as a “grown-up”, but I am not the child I was before. Your prayers would be much appreciated as I wait to see where the Lord will lead.

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