This news came to me via text message.

“He didn’t make it. He died.”

My friend, Laura, had lost her father. A sudden heart attack took his life just two weeks before Christmas. It shook all of us. He was young and healthy.

How could something like this happen?

Fourteen hundred miles away, little Gloria, a sponsored child in Kenya, lost her grandfather. She was already without a father and now the list of loss grows. What good could come from yet another sorrow?

What words are appropriate for the grief Laura’s family is experiencing? And what comfort can be offered to a sponsored child like Gloria who loses a caregiver or a loved one?

How do you give thanks in the midst of overwhelming grief?

My honest fear is that my journey of gratitude, sparked by Ann Voskamp’s book, One Thousand Gifts, will continue to go well for me — until an extreme sorrow comes my way. And I know such sorrow will come, because death is part of every life.

Not for a minute do I believe God wants us to shove the hurt and pain aside just so we can pretend to be thankful, to paste on a fake smile and act like everything is okay. But I do believe that what God wants from me is the confidence to bring all of the tough questions, the heartbreak and anger, to Him.

If I can continue to trust Him in the midst of deeply painful, deeply broken places, that is a gift.

If I can continue to learn more about Christ’s heart in the midst of horrific times, that is a gift.

So today, as I grieve for my friends’ losses, I ask God to infuse in me more of His character. I ask for more of His heart so that I can trust Him when those unimaginable times come for me.

Thankfulness is recognition of who He is, no matter what life offers.

My Account l Sponsor a Child l Help Babies and Moms l Crisis Updates

The other day as I checked Facebook in the early morning, I read this article and was aghast. I shot it off to my team in indignation. My boss quickly wrote back, “Isn’t this a joke site?”

How embarrassing.

But this article is funny because it’s true.

Like the woman who wants to trade her tired out, boring Roberto for a cuter, more exotic Thai girl, how many of us have somewhat self-serving attitudes when it comes to sponsorship?

I have to admit that when my husband and I chose our first sponsored child, we picked a child from India because:

(a) my husband likes Ravi Zacharias
(b) Indians are so good looking

Hey, you gotta choose somehow!

I have a co-worker (who shall remain unnamed) who says that the first time he sponsored a child, he picked up the child pack, read the bio and said,

“He’s perfect! Do you have him in blonde?”

He was quoting “The Simpsons,” but still.

Research on why people give to charitable causes is never very flattering to the donors. According to the study this article cites, when we give, we’re often not motivated by philanthropy or logic, but by our feelings. Namely, our desire to feel good about ourselves.

I’d like to think that over the years, I’ve evolved as a sponsor, that my giving has gone from self-focused to others-focused. But I still have to watch my motivations.

This year when giving Christmas gifts through a charitable catalog, I had to seriously ask myself what’s the purpose of sending the emails that say “Amber has given a gift in your name”— to pet my own ego or to raise awareness of the needs out there? A part of me knew it was a little of both.

One big problem with being motivated by our own feelings when helping others is the long-term effect it has on our giving. Like the woman who wanted to trade in her sponsored child, when we’re motivated by our own needs and feelings, we won’t be committed in the long-term.

We will be more concerned with what we want than what the child needs. We will become more focused on what we’re getting out of our sponsorship experience than on how it is helping the child.

How do you deal with this in your own life?

We are all human and can fall prey to our less-than-noble motivations so quickly and easily. How do you ensure that your giving and sponsorship are in response to the Holy Spirit’s nudging and not your own ego?

My Account l Sponsor a Child l Help Babies and Moms l Crisis Updates

Our correspondence team receives many gifts from sponsors for their sponsored children that can’t be sent to our country offices. If this happens to your gift, we will contact you to see if you’d like the gift returned or donated to a local Colorado Springs charity, Northern Churches Care.

And to help prevent that from happening to you, which items do you think can be sent to your sponsored child through the mail?

Ok, ok. It was a trick question. None of the items can be sent through the mail. Unfortunately, we receive about 300 items like these each month. Our correspondence team spends about eight hours each week sorting out these undeliverable items.

Last year, they were able to donate over 200 shoeboxes.

You can find a list of items that you CAN send to your child through the mail on compassion.com.

UPDATE: November 30, 2011 – Here’s an idea of the volume of items we receive that can’t be sent and which sponsors choose not to have returned.

My Account l Sponsor a Child l Help Babies and Moms l Crisis Updates

I love receiving letters from my sponsored children. My girl in the Dominican Republic colors some precious pictures in each letter she sends us.

Doesn’t it just make your day when you get artwork from your child?

Have you ever considered that your child would love to receive artwork from you?

Sure, we can send blank coloring book pages, but have you ever considered coloring some of them?

Have you ever had your children, nieces or nephews do art and coloring to send to your sponsored child with your letters?

“But Brett, I’m a horrible artist. My artwork stinks. You’ll have better luck finding a flying pig than getting me to keep my colors within the lines.”

Do you think the child will actually care if your drawing isn’t perfect?

Do you think he or she will care if you don’t stay within the lines of your creation?

Not a chance!

Your child will be so proud and happy you took the time to do something special!

“I sponsor a boy and he probably doesn’t want silly pictures or coloring book sheets.”

Perhaps, but I’m sure he likes soccer/football/futbol. Why not try to draw the crest or logo of his favorite team? Or try drawing the child’s country flag.

I told my 3-year-old daughter that we were going to do art for our girl in the Dominican Republic. She picked out a page from one of her Disney coloring books and colored it for Nara. Simple. Meaningful. Heartfelt.

Our online letter writing party is held on the second Friday of every month. Will you join us?

My Account l Sponsor a Child l Help Babies and Moms l Crisis Updates

Paper scraps, bits of string, crumbs and stray Cheerios — as a stay-at-home mom who homeschools two active girls, I spend a fair amount of time sweeping up random stuff that happens to fall to the floor.

On one particular day, I found myself making yet another trip to the broom closet. I will admit, I was frustrated. Certainly, I was lacking cheerfulness and grace.

With an exasperated sigh, I grabbed the broom and went to work corralling another pile of debris that had accumulated beneath our dining-room table.

Later that same day, we received a letter from Precious in Ghana, our first sponsored child. I tore into the envelope and eagerly pulled out the letter.

With the help of her center coordinator, Precious sent greetings in the name of Jesus Christ and told us she was doing very well in school and at home. She shared that she had recently been promoted to Kindergarten 2 and that her school had re-opened for another term.

The next sentence jolted me to my very core.

Precious wrote that she had been sweeping and, when she sweeps, it brings her joy and happiness.

Those words went straight to my heart. Tears instantly came to my eyes. One sentence from a little girl an ocean away immediately and forever changed my perspective.

In our first letter from Precious, we had learned that she lives with her family in a one-room home made of clay.

Yet, despite her living conditions and the fact that her floor is made of dirt, she not only finds joy in sweeping — but she also took the time to share that fact with me.

I don’t doubt for a minute that the timing of the delivery of her message was divine intervention.

After reading the rest of her letter, I went straight to the broom closet with a permanent marker in hand. Along the top of the head of the broom, I wrote Precious.

I wanted to be reminded of her every time I swept.

Ever since, anytime I pick up the broom, I cannot help but smile and think of our sweet girl in Ghana.

Whether I am sweeping for the first or 15th time that day, I no longer feel frustrated or annoyed. Instead, I take that time to thank God for putting Precious in our lives and I pray for all aspects of her life.

I am eternally grateful for the change in attitude that I received from that one simple sentence. Thanks to Precious, now I, too, find joy and happiness in sweeping.

As you have gotten to know your sponsored children, have they changed your perspective on anything?

My Account l Sponsor a Child l Help Babies and Moms l Crisis Updates

As a proud sponsor of Josiane from Rwanda and Emmanuel from Uganda, I’m comforted knowing they are in loving and capable hands. The well-being of Josiane, Emmanuel and your sponsored child is front and center in the minds of the local church staff and our country staff.

The man leading these staff members in Africa is Sidney Muisyo. Sidney began with Compassion in 2002 and five years later became the Kenya Country Director. In April 2010, he became our Vice President of the Africa Region.

Africa has completely stolen my heart. God has given me, as He has so many of you, a tiny piece of His heart for Africa.

For as much as we love Africa, God loves her and her people infinitely more!

Sidney seems to have been entrusted with an especially huge heart and vision for his home. His mind constantly analyzes how current events in Africa relate to the everyday reality of our sponsored children. He is well-educated and well-read. When I need a good book recommendation on the future of Africa, Sidney is my go-to guy.

Emerging Africa is an influential book in this regard. Author Steven Radelet highlights 17 nations changing the face of Africa. No longer can we look at the continent as a constant war-torn area. Countries are rising from the ashes and emerging into their beautiful potential.

Radelet introduces a concept from Ghanaian scholar George Ayittey regarding the new youth of Africa. Ayittey refers to these youth as “the Cheetah Generation.” These are young people who have decided Africa needs to be redefined, restructured and reemerged.

These are young people who offer hope for Africa.

These are young leaders who will invest, care for others, and love passionately. We fervently believe our young babies, sponsored children, and leadership students are cheetahs.

As a sponsor, I’m grateful that the man overseeing our work in Africa believes in my little Emmanuel and little Josiane. I’m thankful that the church staff will continue to breathe life into them and help them run with the speed of cheetahs.

And as my sponsored children grow into all that God has for them, I’m ever so grateful that a man like Sidney will be there to lead the pack.

My Account l Sponsor a Child l Help Babies and Moms l Crisis Updates

Siva is a timid school girl, but she is also a talented champion in silambam, a popular martial art in southern India. Siva is also one of the most refreshing personalities you could come across.

When Selvi and Kalimuthu gave birth to little Siva at Sandhapettai in Madurai, the odds were stacked against the girl. She was born into a family living in abject poverty. Her two brothers discontinued their studies at a young age because there was no money. In a family of eight with little resources, life seemed hard for little Siva.

Siva’s parents are uneducated. Her mother is a housewife. Her father works at construction sites, earning around $4 per day. They have two sheep and a cow. They sell the milk.

Siva practices silambam with the utmost care and precision.

Fortunately, Siva was registered in Compassion and now she is in 10th grade in the Diocese of Madurai and Ramnad Girls’ High School. She has begun to set an example for others. She mingles well with the other children. She is responsible in her work and also very obedient.

She is especially known for time management. She completes all work on time. She is very disciplined in all that she does. She always stands first in her class. In fact, she even gets first place in general knowledge.

Siva prays and reads the Bible regularly. She always gets first in the Bible quiz. She participates in youth camps, youth meetings and games. She loves to be a part of all spiritual meetings. She shares about the Lord to her friends. She is a humble girl and loved by all.

Indeed, Siva wears many crowns. And this young girl has yet another talent given by the Almighty.

She is extremely good at silambam. Silambam is stick fighting, a traditional south Indian martial art. This style is supposed to have originated from Kerala, a coastal south Indian state. Natives used bamboo staves to defend themselves against wild animals. The techniques were perfected into the art of silambam.

The stick used in silambam is 1.68 meters long (5.5 feet), and its diameter is between 1.5 and 2 inches. Its weight ranges from 1 to 1.5 pounds. For training and sparring, a rattan staff is used since it is supple and does not break easily. But a hardwood staff can also be used to gain strength. At times, a little blade is added, acting like a short spear, with the same technique.

As a matter of pride for the CSI Christian Mission Child Development Center, Siva mastered this art of silambam at the center. The center coordinator Puspharaj attended a function where he saw children performing silambam. He thought it would be good to introduce this traditional art in the center, and selected the children who were interested.

“We conducted multiple intelligence tests — visual spatial intelligence, bodily kinesthetic intelligence, etc. Thereby, we found out the specific areas of our children’s interest,” says Pushparaj. “Now, looking at our children, several such clubs have been started all over the state,” he adds.

Siva has many awards.

• First place in Barathiar Republic Day in Madurai Division in 2009
• First in the Madurai District Silambam Competition conducted by Silambam Association in 2009
• Participated in Commonwealth Games rally — Queen Baton’s relay conducted by Sport Development Authority of Tamilnadu in 2010
• First place in Usilampatti Divisional Silambam meet conducted this year (2010)
• Stood first in Kadular District Silbam Competition
• National award in State Silambam Competition 2010

She is always invited to perform at local festivals and holidays. Recently she has been selected to participate in international games, which will be conducted next year in Malaysia.

When asked about her hobbies and dreams, Siva says, “I want to scale greater heights in silambam. I love playing with my friends and watching TV. I go for computer classes, spoken English courses and Bible classes. My dream is to participate in international silambam competition and become a champion.” Siva also aspires to become a software engineer in the future.

Her parents, no wonder, feel proud of their daughter. “My eldest son withdrew from his studies from 5th grade and another son studied only till 10th grade due to lack of proper guidance and financial crisis. But thanks to Compassion, my daughter Siva is studying well.”

“I call my sponsor Mummy. Like a loving mother, she is so concerned of my future.” Yes indeed, Siva feels deeply indebted to her sponsor.

The future burns bright for this humble girl.

My Account l Sponsor a Child l Help Babies and Moms l Crisis Updates

How do you say goodbye to a sponsored child who has died? Have you ever had to do that, or to say goodbye to another child in your life?

As with many things, there’s often the thought, “Oh, that won’t happen to me. That sort of stuff only happens to other people.” Then the world shook in Haiti and changed our perspective.

But children don’t just die or get injured in earthquakes. They die from malaria and AIDS. They die from diarrhea and other preventable causes. They die in childbirth and in accidents. And when they die it’s, well, it’s like this:

I can’t explain how one comes to love a child who they hardly know. But I can say that I felt like Akouvi was part of my family. I loved her. And so often in her letters, she told me that she loved me too.

I don’t think I understood the depth of my love for her until February 23. That’s the day that I found out Akouvi had died. That’s the day I felt like something had cracked open inside of me, filling me with red-hot grief. Sadness that burned so fiercely that even my tears could not extinguish it.

Read the entire post.

I found myself very distracted the day we heard of his death. I wondered how his family is coping. I wondered what kind of ceremony they would have in Tanzania to remember such a precious child. I wondered if his family realized that his sponsor family was at a loss over what to do.

Read the entire post.

My Account l Sponsor a Child l Help Babies and Moms l Crisis Updates

Here’s one thing you need to consider when you ask yourself that question. It’s courtesy of Whittaker Woman and the blog trip to El Salvador.

Keep in mind, the girls speaking aren’t even her sponsored children.

If you can’t visit your children, and we understand that it’s not always possible, you need to know this. It’s an absolute truth. Your sponsored children want to hear from you!

Heather’s got it all down on her blog. You should see for yourself.

The thing they desired most for you to know is how important being a sponsor is.

You are important. You are their angels, you make a difference.

There was one thing that they pleaded with me to share, THEY WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU!

I asked them if they cared if it was written on a card or an email, their answer was ANYTHING.

They just want to hear from you. Every word you say to them is one of the most important things they ever hear. They treasure it, they soak it up, they read it over and over.

So from Gabriella, Jennifer, Beronica, Cindy, Claudia, Clara, Rosio, Carolina, Karan, please write your sponsor child.

My Account l Sponsor a Child l Help Babies and Moms l Crisis Updates

I was among the first lucky ones to get a sponsor, and when I did I had a new family — the Pendleton Browns from Atlanta, Georgia.

Every Saturday I attended the Compassion Saturday program. When I was first enrolled I knew for sure the weekly meetings would interfere with my soccer time, which was also on Saturdays. But when sports were introduced I became comfortable with the idea of attending.

As a kid, I often played at the dumping site and scavenged for edibles that the various companies and airlines disposed of at the site. My friends and I named the dumping site “Chombo.” Chombo is a Swahili word meaning machine.

We named the dump “Chombo” because we found biscuits disposed of by factories that the machine did not cut into the correct shape. Most boys ended up not going to school, but found a home in “Chombo.”

Not many kids made it to high school in my neighborhood, basically because of two reasons; one, to make it to high school, there is a national exam that one has to take. Passing this exam is not easy as such, and if one never makes it in the exam, then there is no place for him or her in high school.

Another reason is that, even if some make it in the exam, they fail to join high school because they cannot afford the school fees.

I thank God for Compassion because it ensured that my school fees were paid for in high school. My sponsor family also encouraged and believed in me, hence I did so well in my exams and joined a government high school.

Some of the kids I grew up with did not get the opportunity to join high school. Most boys went into drug addiction and to nurse their drug addiction, they turned to crime.

Ladies turned to prostitution, and most of them had babies as early as 14 years old.

I saw more than 15 boys I grew up with either being shot down by the police or being stoned to death by mob justice. The community was just fed up with crime and took the law into its own hands.

An event that turned my life is when I saw one of the young men I grew up with and even shared classes with being chased down the streets. Later, the crowd caught up with him, stoned him to death, and set his body ablaze.

I later learned that this young man had stolen an electronic gadget worth maybe less than $100. It saddened me seeing my friend die in the hands of an angry mob.

For a long time I blamed myself for not sharing my faith with him. I resolved to join an evangelism and discipleship class in church popularly known as Campus Crusade for Christ. Here I had opportunity to learn how to share my faith and I saw my friends come to Christ, though some rejected.

By the time I had completed high school, I did not know what the next step would be for me, because in Kenya at the age of 18 years I was due for graduation from the Compassion program and that was it.

For sure, high school education alone could not help me achieve my dreams. I became sad. I really had the desire to proceed with my education, but I knew without the help of Compassion I was not going to make it.

One thing surprised me, though; I did well again in my Kenya Certificate of Secondary Education exams. I became a role model in my community, and I often had parents send their kids to me to talk to them.

I had an interest in teaching kids in church; I found it fun singing with 8- and 9-year-olds and teaching them Bible stories. I also continued sharing my faith in the neighborhood through door-to-door evangelism.

My Account l Sponsor a Child l Help Babies and Moms l Crisis Updates