Still Here

I hardly know where to start. Perhaps I should begin with the presentation.

On August 14 I gave a presentation for “the proposal” I worked on during my internship. By the grace of God, it was received very well. Various department heads were there, including the marketing director himself, and they all liked the idea. A lot. In fact, they liked it so much, the first question was “What are our next steps?”

I was speechless.

My supervisor, Chris Giovagnoni, filled in my silence. “Uhhh …”

Good call Chris. Way to cover.

Shortly after the presentation, I debriefed with Chris. What he then told me only led to yet another level of amazement and surprise.

How would you feel about working with us for another six weeks? You’d be doing different stuff since you completed your internship project, but you’d still be involved with the ‘next step’ discussions. And we’d buy you some time, free of the ‘what do I do now’ question, as Human Resources considers all the candidates for the positions you’ve applied for.”

“Uhhh, yes.”

Let me paint a picture for you.

The night before, I was lying on my back on the floor of my room in tears as I spoke with my mom about my doubt and fears for the future.

“What if I am not supposed to be in Colorado or with Compassion at all?” I sobbed.

“What if my time here is done? Where will I go now? How am I supposed to know what to do?”

God was in control and His timing was perfect … yet again. He made it clear where He wanted me and what He wanted me to be doing the next day, the day of the internship graduation.

Would I have been better off knowing I would be staying days or even weeks before? Not necessarily.

The only thing that would have changed would have been my desperate dependence on Him. I would have begun to take over control of the next steps and, if memory serves me right, I typically screw things up.

So what seemed to be hard and uncomfortable test of faith was actually the Lord’s way of saving me from myself in the long run. It has painted for me a more real and tangible picture of His grace.

So here I sit; in my same cube at my same desk, happy as a lark.

*Furrowed brow*

What is a lark and why is it happy?

13 Comments |Add a comment

  1. Juli Jarvis August 30, 2008

    Love this! And welcome, welcome! He leads us only a step at a time. There’s no need to fret or worry, for it’s always in His hands, moment by moment. My kids are all in very difficult transition times right now. Please be praying for Jeremy, Chris and Sarah!

  2. Mary Dunn August 28, 2008

    Meredith, As your Dad and I sat listening to your presentation. There was no doubt in our minds that Compassion would (and should) make you an offer to stay. Clearly your heart beats with the Lord’s and doing his work is your joy.
    Blessings on your project! We can’t wait to see where it takes you.

  3. Compassion dave August 28, 2008

    I have discovered (in my walk with Jesus) that determining the will of God is extraordinarily easy ‘when’ I seek His will for only this moment in time. Couple that with the understanding that this moment (and the next) are not mine, but His, and suddenly life is a breeze–even if you should get run over by a bus.

  4. Meredith August 28, 2008

    Britney,

    Yes, details are coming! My boss and I are slowly but surely piecing the details together and consulting with others on how to do it and do it well. We want it to be top notch! I’ll try and give y’all a better idea of what it looks like in weeks to come! Thanks so much for the interest!
    Blessings!

  5. Britney August 27, 2008

    Yea!! I am so excited that you get to stay at Compassion for a little while longer.

    Are we going to get any more details about this proposal at some point? I’m really, really curious about it!

  6. Meredith August 27, 2008

    Oh my goodness…I wish I had something to say that was deeper and more profound than “thank you.” You all can’t imgaine just how much your excitement and encouragement truly strengthens me. You provide so much affirmation from the Lord and that is an indescribable blessing to my heart! So thank you!

  7. Lindy August 27, 2008

    Oh, Meredith, I’m so happy for you and will continue to pray for God’s best for you! I really hope it will be with Compassion!

  8. Vicki Small August 27, 2008

    Yippee! I hope you’re there for a really long time, Meredith, and posting to this blog. You started my day (not counting the 15 minutes it takes to feed my dogs, clean the cat’s water dish and add some more kibble to his food dish) with chuckles, and I thank you for that!

    But what makes a lark happy, I couldn’t tell you.

  9. Heather August 27, 2008

    Congrats Meredith! Aside from the uncertainty for awhile how exciting! Glad they liked your proposal and I hope you get the job you applied for!

  10. Abbie H August 27, 2008

    Happy to still see you around!!!

  11. Becky August 27, 2008

    I’m glad you’re here, Meredith. Thanks for letting us into your journey!

  12. Carolyn F August 27, 2008

    Well done!

  13. Melissa Coast August 27, 2008

    Awww Meredith….we love you!

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