When I was touring with the Compassion Experience, one of my favorite places to be stationed was at the very end of the tour, where the child packets were located. I’d see the faces on the walls of the truck and thousands of faces come through that room. Once we finished set up, I would sometimes just stand in that room and marvel at the precious little faces on the packets, waiting to be sponsored.
During my time on the road, we were fortunate enough to have Julian attend a few events. This was always a special treat for us as well as for people walking through her story.
At one event, a family came through the Experience and wanted to talk to Julian about letter writing. They wanted to know if it really did have as much impact as people said. In her ever sweet manner, Julian replied that it meant even more than we could communicate.
Julian then went on to tell us about one of the Compassion centers in Africa that stopped handing out letters in a big group because so many children didn’t get letters from their sponsors. She shared that the children would then come and ask her and other staff if something was wrong with them. If their sponsor didn’t love them?
As she described the heartbreak for these little kids desperately waiting for a letter, I felt tears well up in my own eyes. I wondered if the two kids I sponsor ever felt that way when mail would come and there was nothing from me. It changed the way I viewed letter writing and interacting with them.
I can’t say I’m as diligent as I should be, but I’ve tried to be better at writing, encouraging, and loving them from my own little corner of the world.
What follows is a fictional story of what I imagine it’s like to not get a letter as a child who is sponsored.
My mother shook me awake. “Manuel. Manuel, it’s time to get up. We need something to start the fire. Run and get it.”
I rubbed my eyes with my fist. It was still dark, but I knew she had been awake for awhile. The sun would be breaking through the clouds soon enough and I was already behind in my chores.
My feet hit the dirt floor quickly as I raced outside to find leftover scraps from last night’s fires. I knew that someone somewhere would have something I could bring home. We just needed a little to cook our breakfast. If you can call it that. It’s really just a mixture of water and flour. But it fills my belly and I’m grateful to have it.
As I walked along the side of the road, searching the landscape for anything to burn, I realized what day it was.
Mail day.
Today is the day we get mail at the child development center.
Letters.
My heart started racing. I’ve been sponsored with Compassion for three years now and I’ve gotten three letters. Those days stick out in my mind. I remember the temperature of the air, the feel of the paper against my hands as I reached to grab it.
I studied each curve of her handwriting. Auntie Sarah is what I call her. I can’t read English but I know exactly how she draws her letters and symbols. Every week I read those three letters. She’s going to college in America. She said she loves Jesus, the same Jesus they tell me about at the center.
She is a very busy lady and I can’t believe she’s written me three letters. I feel like the luckiest kid in the world. It’s been almost a year now since my last letter and I just know today is the day. Today there’s going to be a new letter.
It’s my lucky day! I found some leftover firewood to burn! Mama is going to be so happy with me. The house will be smoky but it won’t smell like trash. Mama doesn’t like it when we make the house smell like trash.
I race home, occasionally jumping up in the air and shouting like a superhero. I drop the wood in front of Mama and smile. She nods towards our pot and then turns back around. Mama is busy. I know she doesn’t mean anything by it. She’s proud of me, I know it.
While our breakfast is cooking, I get ready for school. I’m in the second grade. I really love school and when I grow up, I want to be like my Auntie Sarah and go to college. I haven’t told anyone that but I’m going to do it. I’m going to be a doctor and help the people in my village get better.
School is usually the best part of my day. But today all I can think about is going to the Compassion center. Not even my team winning futbol makes the time go any quicker! This day will never end!
Finally. It’s finally time to go.
I run as fast as I can to get to the gate and wave at Andre. He’s my friend at the center. He helps me study and learn so many things. Andre’s a little bit older than me but makes me feel like I’m almost all grown up. I like him.
“Andre! Andre, today is the day! I just know it!!! Auntie Sarah is sending a letter!” I shout excitedly.
Andre looks at me with a smile. “Maybe today is the day Manuel. We’ll have to see!”
“How much longer do we have to wait until the letters come? Is it time yet?” I start to wriggle with anticipation.
“Finish your studies and then it will be time.” He pushes my math homework in front of me.
I sigh and sit down trying to concentrate on my math problem. Addition is so hard! I don’t think I’ll ever understand it.
Finally, after forever, Andre tells me it’s time to go outside for letters. We see Santos, the guy in charge, come outside with that big bag. We all start running towards him.
My heart starts pounding. This is it. Today is the day. Santos starts reading names out. He’s got a stack as big as my hands. It has to be there! It HAS to.
He’s halfway through now. Ada, Rosa, Marco, Jose. All my friends are getting letters. I lick my lips.
“Please. Please be there.” I whisper.
Two letters left. I hear my best friend’s name read. He jumps up and runs to Santos. I’m excited for him but I see one letter left. “It has to be mine.”
“Maria.”
My head drops and I feel the tears clog my throat. My friends are all around me, buzzing with excitement and comparing letters. The rest of us who didn’t get a letter get quiet and walk away.
“Manuel.” I hear Andre. I can’t look at him. I don’t want him to see how sad I am. I keep kicking the dirt and walk away.
“Manuel. Manuel, stop.” I feel his hand on my shoulder.
“Manuel. Just because you didn’t get a letter today doesn’t mean it’s not coming. Here, come sit with me. I want to show you something.”
We walk over to the side of the playground and sit down. I keep wiping at my face trying to get the tears to stop. I hate crying. I hate when other people see me cry. I am strong and big.
Andre opens his backpack and pulls out a small stack of letters.
“Remember when I told you my sponsors lived in America too? Well, these are all of the letters they have ever written me. I want to read one to you.”
I look at him confused.
Greetings, Manuel! How are you? We have been praying for you every day. Manuel, I want you to know you can be anything you want to be. Because we are made new in Jesus we have been given a new life. It doesn’t matter where you were born or what anyone else says about you. God has a purpose and a plan for your life, Manuel. You can never out dream God’s plan for you life. Today I want you to tell someone your dreams and what you want to be when you grow up. Because with God, all things are possible, beloved. We pray you grow to be a man of character and wisdom. You are in our hearts, Manuel. With all our love, Chuck and Betty Larson.
Andre looks at me and says, “Manny, when I got this letter, I was going to quit school. I wrote Chuck and Betty back and told them I wanted to be a teacher. They sent me another letter telling me they would pray with me and help me any way they could. I didn’t believe it but they believed in me.”
“But if that’s your letter, why does it have my name in it?” I look up at him with wide eyes.
“Because,” Andre begins, “Even though Sarah hasn’t written these words I know she believes them about you. So instead of my name, I put your name in there. Chuck and Betty believed in me the same way Sarah believes in you.”
I finally start to get it.
“Um, Andre, can I read all your letters?”
“Of course Manny. But first. What do you want to be when you grow up?” he asks me.
I swallow hard. The words are stuck in my throat.
“A doctor. I want to be a doctor.”
Andre smiles.
“Then Manny, that is what I will pray you become.” He hands me his letters and says, “Read the letters, and then we’re going to sit down and write a letter to Sarah telling her you want to be a doctor when you grow up.”
I take his stack of letters, carefully open the first one, and start to read.
This day turned out to be the best day ever, because I didn’t get one letter, I got twenty.
About the Author: Former Compassion employee Rachel Mueller lives in Denver, CO and blogs at rachelmueller.net.
23 Comments |Add a comment
I have been a sponsor for about 6 months. My question is how often do you recommend that sponsors write their child. I know people who write at least once a month, and others that only write once or twice a year. I know there is not right or wrong answer per say, but I want to make sure I am writing enough to let my child know he is loved. Of course, life is very busy and it is hard to always find the time.
Elizabeth, thank you for your love and care for your child! I think you have what is most important in mind – making sure he knows that he is loved. I would encourage you to find whatever frequency works for you. Anywhere between once a month to every 2-3 months to every 6 months is a good amount to write. We have a group of sponsors who have committed to writing the second Friday of each month just to make it easy to remember and schedule to write but I would say whatever works for you and as long as you are communicating what is important – that he is loved – you are doing well! 🙂
Thank you for the reminder. I have been a sponsor many years. I have loved writing my sponsored children but have been forgetting to do this on a regular basis during the past few years. How do you write them on line?I do know that there are sponsors who do love and pray for their kids but do not write letters to anyone really. Perhaps it would be good for the kids to hear that just the fact that their sponsor covers their financial school needs shows a form of love in and of itself. I feel as if sponsors who do not write will be made to feel guilty by this post. I respond to guilt and will make more of an effort to write but I fear the intent of this post may indeed drive others to feel unappreciated for what they are doing.
Hi Janet! To write your child online, log in to your My Account on https://www.compassion.com and click ‘Write My Child’ on the left side of the page. From there, it will take you through the process of selecting a template, uploading pictures, and writing your child. Your letter will be printed off in our Colorado Springs office and then mailed to your child :).
Please know that our intention from this post is not to make sponsor’s feel guilty but to instead show the value and impact that words have on the lives of these children. We certainly understand that writing is not for everyone and sometimes it is hard to know what to write. For sponsor’s who do not have the time or desire to write a child, we offer the option of assigning them a correspondent to write to their child and they are still able to contribute financially. We are truly grateful for the support that each sponsor selflessly and sacrificially gives to these precious kiddos and their financial assistance is changing the lives of children all over the world. Compassion would not be able to assist these children without the love poured out by sponsors through their giving.
For more tips on writing your child, I started a Facebook page of creative things you can send/letter tips. Here’s the link: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Encouraging-Words/571351182994967?ref=hl
I sometimes am a little remiss in writing to my children, I use the on-line correspondence a lot so I can copy the same letter and modify it if I need to, it sure saves time. Even if I don’t have news to tell them I go ahead and write at least once a month even if it is just to tell them that I love them and I am thinking of them.
Thank you very much for the information. Compassion does so much to encourage sponsors to write and provides support in so many ways. One more question. If someone sponsors a child and later finds that they cannon or choose not to write, can they be given the option to set up a correspondent? When I read about all those children not receiving letters, I’m just wondering whether sponsors who are getting reminders to write and never respond might also be given a card with an option to request a correspondent. Thank you for your time.
Hi there! We realize the impact that letters have on a child’s self worth. We also understand if a sponsor does not have the time to write to their child or they just want to financially support their child. In this case if a sponsor mentions this to us then we will suggest, or a sponsor may ask us to find a correspondent to write to their child and we are happy to do this! -Emily
Can those of us who would love to write letters be partnered with children who have never received a letter? I sponsor three children and I also write to a child as a sponsor correspondent. It is my understanding that this person generously chose to sponsor a child financially but could not or did not want to write letters. I have welcomed this opportunity. I understand it is always ideal for the actual person who is paying to write to the child. But since there are so many sponsors who do not write even with all the supports you offer, couldn’t we be matched with some of those children? I feel so badly for the children who have never received a letter and I believe there are many who would be happy to write letters to another child. I am not referring to new sponsors, but to the children who are already sponsored and waiting for a letter. Thank you for your consideration
Hi Margie! This is our hope – that those sponsors who are willing and able to give but for whatever reason are unable to write letters would ask us to setup a correspondent for their children. Regrettably, we have to reserve the right to write letters for the financial sponsor unless they tell us otherwise.
It is my hope that ALL Compassion centers stop handing out letters in a big group. The fact that so many children don’t get letters from their sponsors on a certain day is not only heartbreaking it is shameful that we place children in the position to feel this loss and have even one thought that there if something is wrong with them or that their sponsor doesn’t love them. Please consider changing this policy.
Courtesy of Compassion International: https://blog.compassion.com/desperately-waiting-for-a-letter/#ixzz2y8VFU4BD
Brenda, you are completely right that this is heartbreaking. While many of our centers hand out letters from sponsors to the children as they are leaving for the day or individually, regrettably, Compassion does not have a global policy of how the letters are to be given to the children. We will definitely consider making a global policy along these lines though.
We have seen that there are children who have never received a letter from their sponsor and this is always difficult for that child to understand. It is so heartwrenching! I have seen children and the lies that they hear – that they are worthless and trash – are are reinforced by their sponsor not writing to them. These children begin to believe that they are not worth writing to. This problem is not related to the way in which the letters are delivered but it is more related to the very real and important part that letter writing has in breaking the lies of poverty in the life of a child.
My husband and I are sponsoring two girls, one in Indonesia, and one in Ecuador. I know that both of them have siblings. I wished I’d know if their siblings also have sponsors, and if they do, if their sponsors write them.
Because in either case, I would love to send letters and little gifts along to them when I write our sponsored girls.
Is it allowed for you to give me that information, or do I have to ask the girls?
Hi Ursula! Thank you for wanting to bless your girls’ siblings in such a tangible way! Their siblings may or may not be in the program. Regrettably, I was unable to find a US account for you but I wonder, do you sponsor your children through our Compassion Canada office? If so, please contact Compassion Canada and they will be happy to see if your children’s siblings are in the program and are sponsored. Either way, you are more than welcome to encourage them with fun letters and paper gift items! 🙂
Letters are so important! My young teen in Bangladesh once told me that he looks forward to my letters every month. Nearly all of my kids have thanked me for encouragement. My young man in the Philippines admitted that because of my letters, he returned to school. Our letters can influence their lives for Jesus, but first, we have to write.
I also am not as diligent as I “should be.” Sometimes, I am able to write to all of my girls once a month, for maybe three months. And then too much time passes before the next.
But I couldn’t even read this post, until I written to all of my girls. Tonight. Much has happened, since my last letter, so I have more to send tomorrow. Why I can’t send both parts on the same day, I’m not sure, but the system won’t allow it. So I will finish sending the second part tomorrow, and then determine, again, to send encouragement and love to each one, more often.
How do I sponser a child fot the writting theme
Hi Linda! If you would like to sponsor a child, please visit https://www.compassion.com/sponsor_a_child/default.htm?referer=133488 If you would like to become a letter writer to a child in need with no financial commitment, please email us at [email protected]. We’d be happy to get you setup! 🙂
Is there really a way to write to children without committing financially? (I’m a poor college student, but I do love writing letters)
Hi Kinsley! Yes, there is a way to write to and encourage children without committing financially! The commitment is simply to write at least three letters every year. Please email us at [email protected] with you mailing address and we would be happy to get you started! 🙂
Thank you! That was beautiful 🙂 Kids love letters, and some kids need them even more than others. I should write every month to mine. Going to make more of a commitment to do it now.
Great story! I think it is important for us all to remember that our sponsored children await letter from us just as much as we await letters from them. I hope everyone dedicates time to write to them even if you are writing more than they are. Let them know constantly your love and support. Let them know that you want a personal relationship with them other then just sending money to them. Encourage them and use your letters to share the word of God with them.
I do have a question…are our letters sent in the envelopes/packaging that we put them in? I know I sometimes put stickers on the envelope and was wondering if it is forwarded with the letter.
Hi Tina! So True! Thank you for sharing! If the outside envelope has your return address on it (personal contact information), we will throw that envelope away to protect your information. However, if you’d like, you are more than welcome to decorate an inside envelope and enclose it in a larger envelope addressed to us. We will then send the inside envelope along with your letter.