Written by: Vicki Small
Sometime back, a commenter on another blog post asked questions about sending gifts to our sponsored children:
- Do they make a difference?
- Should we wait until we hear about a need?
- Do the children appreciate our gifts?
One of my earliest lessons in the importance of our gifts came from Tausi (Tanzania). I began sponsoring her soon after her stated birth date (which later proved to be wrong, but…) and immediately sent a gift of $25.
A few months later, I received a thank-you letter for both her birthday and Christmas gifts. These are the gifts she listed: a dress, sugar, rice, soap, body oil, and her school uniform (required in many countries for enrollment).
Have you ever seen items like sugar, rice or soap on a kid’s wish list? I would never have known to specify that such items be bought!
And would I ever tell a child to buy a toothbrush and toothpaste for her birthday? Not likely! Yet, those also appeared in a list, one time.
Most of the birthday and Christmas gifts I have sent to Tausi have been spent on clothes, shoes, food and the like. But one time, in addition to a skirt and a blouse, she also bought a carpet for the family’s sitting room.
Later, I heard of the program Compassion had once run to buy goats for Compassion-assisted families (in Haiti, I believe). Not realizing that program had ended, I called Compassion to ask how I could buy goats for Tausi and Denisse (in the Dominican Republic).
I learned that the program had been a special undertaking for a limited time, and the lady I spoke with also advised me to allow the family, in consultation with the church partner staff, to decide what they most needed to do with a family gift.
Wise advice.
She added that the family might need a bed, for example, more than a goat. See how that was impressed on my mind, later:
I began sponsoring Uwizera in the spring of 2006. As her birthday would come around a couple of months later, I promptly arranged for a gift.
A few months later, I received her thank-you letter, which included this information:
“I thank you for the gift you sent me of 13,775 [Rwandan] francs. I gave a church offering of 1,375 francs. I used the remaining money to buy shoes for 300 francs, a bed for 8,000 francs. We used the rest [4,100 francs] to buy food.”
Did you get the part where she tithed on her birthday money?
I’m sure there are some Christians in our country who have always tithed on every money gift they received, but no one had ever suggested that I should. I didn’t know it was “titheable income”!
Uwizera taught me the meaning of being a “cheerful giver” and giving back to the Lord.
Other gifts to Uwizera have been used for clothes for her, for a school uniform, for a parcel of land — small, I think, that they use for a garden. They planted beans there last November.
They have also bought a goat, a hen (maybe two), and a rooster, all at various times. And she always tithes on the gifts.
I am focusing, here, on only two of my girls because I seldom receive any specific information about gifts from my other two. They usually say, “Thank you so much for your gifts.”
I have been able, one time each, to send gifts with friends for Tausi and Uwizera. I sent the gifts for Tausi a few years ago and received a letter and a photo in return.
In the photo, she was holding the gifts in front of her and had the shyest look on her face. She thanked me, adding, “I know you did this because you love my life.” Ah, good. She understood!
The gifts for Uwizera made their way last February. I had a lot to send, with some specialty gifts for sewing, so one zip-lock bag was carried by each of three gracious friends.
After listing most of the items and thanking me, she told me that her whole family (eight or nine strong) had been so thankful that they stopped what they had been doing to spend 30 minutes praying for us.
Have I ever been that grateful?
Compassion does not require that sponsors send money gifts to their children, and the amounts we are permitted to send for birthdays and Christmas are not large amounts. If you can afford to provide those gifts, you should do so a couple of months, or more, prior to the child’s birthday.
If you are able and want to send larger gifts at other times, Compassion allows family gifts of $25 to $300. The staff at the child development center will work with your child’s family and then buy the items the family needs.
Reading my girls’ thanks and knowing how they have used the money humbles me, every time. My little amounts ($25 for birthdays, $18 for Christmas) mean so much more to them than they do to me!
I hope I have made clear that:
- yes, our sponsored children are grateful.
- no, I would never know what they needed, ahead of time.
- yes, our gifts make a difference.
Don’t wait, assuming your child will tell you what they need. Give out of your abundance, and wait to hear how God multiplies your loaves and fishes.
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September 28th, 2009 at 7:03 am
I sent family gifts to all of my children earlier this year, and I’m starting to get their thank you notes now. My boy in India bought a bike, so now he doesn’t have to walk 2.5 km to school. Something that would seem so small to children here means the world to our sponsored kids.
September 28th, 2009 at 7:12 am
Thanks so much for letting us know how much the gifts are appreciated — even if we are only told in general terms “thanks for the gift” in a letter.
I’ve only been sponsoring Gabriel in Indonesia for about a year–still developing a relationship with him. His birthday is in March, so I sent a birthday gift well ahead of time–there was actually a prompt on my online account sometime in October, and I sent it soon after I saw that. And shortly after his birthday I sent a family gift. I think the last letter I received from him was dated in late April, so he probably had gotten the birthday gift, but maybe not the family gift. But, since I’ve gotten the standard 3-4 letters a year from him, and his dad has been doing the writing, maybe they had other things to tell me than about the birthday gift.
I’d love to know that the money actually got there, even if I never know how it was spent –although that would be nice, too! 
September 28th, 2009 at 7:48 am
Thanks for this post. It is one of my favorite things to do – send additional gifts to my kids. After the first gift I sent Collins in Kenya, he wrote back and said, “Thank you for the gift you sent. I never had a mattress or a blanket before and our roof leaked when it rained.” Wow! I think/am sure that I am more blessed in the giving than they are in the receiving.
September 28th, 2009 at 8:28 am
excellent point Vicki!
September 28th, 2009 at 8:52 am
Thank you for your post! I once sent a family gift of $60 to my little girl in Indonesia. I got a thank you note back not only from her, but one from her parents as well. They said that they had been 3 months behind on their electricity bill and had no way of paying it. They had been praying that God would provide, and He did!! The money was enough to pay the bill and also to buy clothing for my little girl.
September 28th, 2009 at 8:55 am
I too have noticed how some of my kids say “thank you for the gift,” and others list in great detail what they bought. Once I had the opportunity to travel to Kenya and I dropped off gifts for the sponsored girls of my grandma and sister (I didn‘t get to meet the kids -long story). Later on my Grandma got a really nice thank you letter with two pictures. My sister only got a letter saying the classic “thank you for the gift.”
September 28th, 2009 at 9:05 am
How wonderful that Uwizera had the initiative and willingness to tithe on her birthday money! I’ve always received a thorough accounting of how money I’ve sent Josephine (in Uganda) has been spent — and most of the pictures I get are of her wearing/holding her gifts. She’s young enough that so far her teachers have been the ones to write the accounting, but I hope this is something she continues once she starts to write herself!
On the subject of not knowing what they need ahead of time…the first thank-you letter I received from Josephine listed the items she’d spent her money (~$20) on: a dress, a pair of shoes, a hen, 1 kg meat, and…get this…shaving her hair! That gave me a chuckle. I mean, I’m glad she got it shaved if it needed to be done, but I’d *never* have guessed she’d use the money for that!
September 28th, 2009 at 11:55 am
Excellent post! Thanks for sharing these details!
September 28th, 2009 at 12:22 pm
Shannon, it is great that you get photos from Josephine! From all of my kids only one has sent me that kind of photo.
September 28th, 2009 at 12:41 pm
Vicki, thanks for doing this important topic. I just wanted to mention that my kids are in Honduras, and I just a week ago got the Thank You from a family gift I sent to one of them Feb. 2! Kiara was so grateful, and listed everything they bought with it…including beans and rice…she mentioned how much they needed it. I sent the family gift for them because the Lord prompted me to do it…I felt that there was an important reason I needed to send it, and come to find out they needed food most of all… yes they are indeed important!
September 28th, 2009 at 12:41 pm
Thanks for this post – I find also that the thank you notes are sometimes educational. Praveen wrote us last time that he bought a carrom board with his gift money – we had to look it up!
September 28th, 2009 at 7:33 pm
Amy…. We gave my son a carrom board for Christmas two years ago after he learned to play with neighborhood friends that are from India. It is really FUN to play… and Praveen chose well as he can play with family and friends!
)
I sent my first gift money in May (other than the Christmas funds) and I can’t wait to hear what Ludis bought with it. Her birthday is in early December, so she’ll be getting something then too….
I have to admit that I’m a bit confused, as I thought I had read on this site that everyone at least gets an account of what the gift money was spent on…. even if they don’t get a photo? But now I’m reading that some just get a “thank you” and no mention of what was bought…. I sure hope I find out what Ludis bought….
September 29th, 2009 at 4:29 am
I gave family gifts to 4 of my children earlier this year. Two of my children repaired damage to their homes – a new roof, new floor and one of them also got clothes and food. Another child bought food, shoes and clothes for the whole family. I gave $200 to my longest sponsored child and with it they bought materials to build a house! The money I sent them was a tax refund that I know we could have wasted easily on things we didn’t need but instead my children repaired homes, got food and clothes and even a new house. Along with my sponsorship fees, it is some of the best money I’ve ever spent. Geri
September 29th, 2009 at 9:45 am
Michelle, most of the time you will get a detailed list of how your child used the money. I have gotten a few “thank you for the gift” but for the most part the kids will list the items and sometimes the prices too.
September 29th, 2009 at 9:47 am
You have pointed out the right topic.
Thanks for the information
Deepak
September 29th, 2009 at 9:51 am
One letter that I received thanking me for my gift was in Spanish and somehow had slipped through without a translation. I was able to read most of it, but the second two things my child bought were new words for me. Is anyone able to translate this for me?
Me compraron un pantalon -2- paldemeria, un pantaloncillo.
September 29th, 2009 at 10:00 am
Sara – I think they are talking about trousers and jeans.
September 30th, 2009 at 1:21 pm
Sara, I asked my coworker, who is from Puerto Rico, she says she thinks your child is saying they bought pants, two T-shirts, and underwear.
September 30th, 2009 at 5:07 pm
Thanks! I asked a friend from Chile and she was not sure.
September 30th, 2009 at 5:31 pm
I tho’t I’d be really smart and use Google’s Language Tools to translate. One problem: the word paldemeria just keeps coming out exactly the same. My mediocre Spanish/English dictionary does not include the word.
By the way, I said this in the comments on FB, but for those who might not have seen it: I have thoroughly enjoyed reading other people’s experiences with giving gifts to their children! I’m so glad the post was so well received; it obviously touched a chord, and I hope it encouraged those who had been holding off on giving gifts to go ahead, as they are able. The blessings go in every direction!
September 30th, 2009 at 7:22 pm
Michelle, if for some reason you do not get a full accounting of how the gift was spent, you can call Compassion and they will send a request to the project. My sponsored child told me that with a family gift (he listed the Brazilian monetary amount) he got bathing towels and several specific clothing articles. As the cost of those items was vastly less than my gift (gift was $100-200 range) and I knew Compassion wouldn’t have spent a family gift just on a child, I asked Compassion to look into it. The sponsor relations representative (person at 800#)said my child probably chose to simply tell me what he got rather than his whole family in the letter. I can understand children are like that and his family did buy over a dozen different things with the gift, which is alot for a kid to write. I did get a full accounting within a month of my request, which I thought was quite fast for having to contact the project and get a response.
October 1st, 2009 at 10:02 am
Becky… I had to laugh when I read that the little boy just wrote down what he got instead of what the entire family got! I can see my own son doing that….
)
Vicki, I’m glad you wrote your post! I had already sent the gifts, but I always love reading what families from different areas of the world choose to buy. I hope more people send gifts too, as I can only imagine the glee on all those little faces!!!
October 1st, 2009 at 10:55 pm
I send a small birthday gift and also a family gift. I can say I am always happily surprised how the family uses my gift. These gifts have helped my families buy food, suits so fathers can look for work, bicycles, sewing machines, beds, doors and windows (to keep out thieves), and even land (which I didn’t think Compassion did, but am extremely pleased about.) I have no doubt the gifts are greatly appreciated and a tangible reminder to my families they are dearly loved. I strongly encourage my fellow sponsors to give gifts as best they are able. I believe nothing could go further in helping build faith, about God’s love and provisions, in a child than a letter and gift from their sponsors.
October 2nd, 2009 at 6:05 am
I received detailed lists of things bought with birthday and Christmas gift money from 2 of my children. My seven year old child wrote the list himself and the correspondence monitor wrote for my nine year old child. My 6 year old and 8 year old children will just thank me for the gifts without going into details.
I wasn’t expecting a detailed list however it was nice to know what my children bought. I was surprised to find out what $25 and $18 could buy.
October 2nd, 2009 at 6:20 am
I wish I had enough money to give family gifts to all 5 of my children. Maybe one day.
October 2nd, 2009 at 11:56 am
Here’s my story about a family gift:
On May 25, the SW region of Bangladesh was all but destroyed by Cyclone Ayla. Hundreds of deaths occurred and hundreds of thousands were left homeless. Even after the storm dissipated the land remained ( and still remains to this day) submerged in contaminated floodwater, safe drinking water was scarce and water-borne illnesses widespread. With scant coverage of this disaster in the media, I would probably never have known of this event, if it hadn’t been for CI’s coverage of the situation and their response found on compassion.com’s Crisis Update link.
My 6-year-old Arup’s was (and still is) in the midst of the devastation. I immediately began fervent prayers for him, his family and others affected. And I sent a family gift…
My family is not wealthy by Western standards, but compared to Arup’s Bangladeshi family we certainly are. With that in mind, I sent the maximum family gift of $300.00, knowing that his need was far greater than ours. And I continued to write my monthly letters to him…
I told Arup that I was praying for him and his family. I told him that he could rely on God for strength and I quoted scripture passages of encouragement to him. I told him that God was sending a monetary gift to him through me, and that I hoped would satisfy their greatest needs. With each letter, I included the usual…a sticker strip, coloring pages, even a bilingual English/Bengali book I found on the Internet. And I waited…
No news from CI meant that Arup was okay. But how was he exactly? Then it arrived…a letter from Arup, himself. I was written before the gift money, but he was indeed alive! Praise God!
Arup writes, “…The matter of sorrow is that a storm called Ayla drowned all the land and washed away my house. All the crops have gone with it. We are now living in the cyclone center.” And as always he writes, “I pray for YOU!” What a sweet boy!
Then yesterday, the thank-you letter arrived. “…still the village is submerged underwater,” Arup reports. He thanks me repeatedly for the gift money and reports that “we have bought brick, sand, cement and pay wages to the labors to build our house.” And later in the letter Arup add, “I liked the Bible verses that you mentioned and I memorize them.”
I cried like a baby to hear all this. A $300 gift could take a family out of a shelter in Bangladesh and restore them into a house of their own. How humbling is that?!
And a little boy memorizing scripture suggested to him by a woman thousands of miles away. I cried even more! God has blessed me beyond words!
I’ve always sent birthday and Christmas gifts, but now I will add family gifts, too. Even if a need as great as Arup’s isn’t present in the lives of my other three sponsored children, the reality is that they are still in poverty. Whether they use it for daily necessities or invest it in an income-generating purchase, I know they need the money more that I do.
October 2nd, 2009 at 1:28 pm
Ken, even if you don’t have enough money to send to all of your kids, maybe you could send it to them one at a time.
I have been giving a family gift every few months when I can scrape together $50 or so.
October 4th, 2009 at 9:01 pm
The weeping started as I read the original post, and continued as I read the responses from all the wonderful, compassionate sponsors gathered here.
I have sent a family gift as well, and I have been working towards sending another. This thread has brought it to the top of my priority list. Thank you for the intense reminder.
October 5th, 2009 at 9:47 am
Sandy, I cried, too, reading your note about what your gift means to Arup and his family! Our God is so good!
Btw, another letter came from Uwizera, while I was at the Advocates Conference: “Beloved parents…I thank you very much for the gifts you sent to me worth 14,138 [RW] francs. I gave tithe worth 1413 frn, I bought four hens, I am always praying for you to be blessed. I conclude by wishing you peace and may God bless you. Thank you!”
I’m losing count, but I think that makes six hens, now, bought with our gifts.
October 5th, 2009 at 11:14 am
just last night i sat at my computer and went through the photos of children needing sponsers. I finally settled on a 13 year old boy named Hamini. Im new to this but this blog has helped alot. I now realize it might take months to hear from him and how much a family gift will mean. I also now know it will take months to get the family gift. what you guys have been doing is amazing. Thanks for the blogs the stories they tell show the difference GOD is making in their lives and yours.
October 9th, 2009 at 12:47 pm
I thoroughly enjoyed reading all of the comments and stories in this blog. It encourages me to be patient and pray for my child I sponsor, as I wait to recieve her first letter back, and to hear what she’s used my gift money for. In these days of fast email, it’s frustrating at times to wait, wait, wait, but in the end God is teaching me patience. Thank you all for sharing your stories!
October 10th, 2009 at 7:37 pm
Ray – Yes, sponsoring these children provides many opportunities to accept delayed gratification! But it’s so worth the wait, as we build those relationships with the kids. Bless you!
Shannon – thanks so much for sponsoring Hamini! So many blessings are in store for you, as well as for him!
October 24th, 2009 at 8:09 pm
I’m sending family gifts this week. My three young children and I rolled coins to generate family gifts for all 6 of our Compassion kids. I am hoping we’ll learn how the gifts were used so my own kids can see how our pocket change can have a big impact on our family in Africa. I hope to hear about how they were used before I go meet some of my children in Tanzania next summer.
Thanks to all who wrote of their experiences!
October 27th, 2009 at 6:13 pm
Thanks so much everyone for the insight into family gifts. I thought the child would let me know of any family needs, but it’s obvious to me now that God has used this post to show me what I need to do. Thanks…
Has anyone been to Tanzania on a mission trip before? I’m planning on going next May if I can financially work it out. Any information on costs, itenerary, etc would be greatly appreciated. God Bless!
November 5th, 2009 at 7:12 pm
Dear fellow parents,
Thank you so much for sharing your stories.
I have been sponsoring Gidion in Tanzania for about 8 years now and have been truly blessed by our relationship. He is such a wonderful and sweet boy.
Yesterday, after praying with my husband I took a “leap of faith” and registered to visit Gidion next May. The reason behind the “leap” is that my husband was recently laid-off, however, we know that the Lord will provide! I am so excited, and I pray every night for my email from Compassion telling me that I am “officially” accepted to go.
Please pray for us.
November 13th, 2009 at 4:31 pm
This article makes me tear up as I have had similar experiences with my child. She and her family are always so thankful for the gift that I give them and they always send their thanks. Now if I could only get my own children to be as thankful!
November 15th, 2009 at 1:19 pm
I plan on sending my first family gift this year. According to the project information, March is the most difficult time of year for the people in Colombia. This is the time of year when food is the most scarce. So, I was planning on sending my family gift in January so that it should get to my girl’s family in March. I sent Michell a birthday gift in July. I haven’t heard yet what she got herself. I hope to hear soon! Thanks to all of you for sharing your stories.
December 9th, 2009 at 5:13 pm
Thank you for that narrative. I recently became a sponsor with Compassion, and thank God everyday for impessing upon my heart to choose a child named Benjamin. Thank you again, your narrative has inspired me.
Patricia
January 15th, 2010 at 12:50 am
I sponsor three children and recently Anildson in Brazil graduated from the program. I long to know what is going on in his life now, but as I told him in my last letter, we will meet one day in heaven. My kids have always sent me lists and sometimes pictures of the items purchased with my money. When I first sponsored Anildson and he was six, he wrote that he purchased tennis shoes with his money, something he had wanted “all of his life.” I laughed and cried at the same time. I am amazed and humbled by all the families can purchase with the family gifts I have sent, mattresses, chickens, goats, food, clothes, etc. Praise God!