The “H” Word

Like many of you, I’m no stranger to grief or tragedy. Ten years ago my mum died from a condition resulting from radiotherapy. A year later, my aunt also passed away.

I thought I’d learned enough about loss. Then three years ago, my husband and I found out we were pregnant. Elation turned to grief when a few weeks later, I miscarried.

I’d dealt with losing a parent, but to lose a child before you could even see the heart beat? That had never entered my mind. What do you do when grief laps at your feet again?

I wrote in my journal at the time:

“Hope is the only thing that can enable you to look up. It’s the only thing you can cling to when you know that the world has kept on going even though you’ve stopped and you know you have to join them again.

For me, it’s the hardest thing about grief. The getting up. You have to let go. But letting go requires courage and the belief that you’re not forgetting or blocking it out as if nothing ever happened, but that you accept that it has hurt you and you have mourned, but life doesn’t finish here. So even though tears still stain my face, I can’t stay in this moment.”

person reading Bible and taking notes

Hope can sometimes sound like a dirty word. The following months were the toughest I’d experienced. It seemed as if everyone was telling me they were pregnant. I honestly wondered whether it was all some cruel joke.

But when those thoughts begin to haunt us, we need to remind ourselves that the hope we have is firm and secure. Jesus is Hope. When all seems impossible, when the outlook is bleak, His Word is sure and His faithfulness never ending.

Our hope and dream has become reality. Our baby girl was born on 29 July, 2011, and she is perfect. Her name is Imogen Hope.

So whatever is overwhelming you, don’t give up. If you’ve lost hope, don’t give up. God is faithful. Hope in Him.

We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. —Hebrews 6:19a, NIV

Prayer: Lord and Father, thank You for the hope we have in You — a hope that never fails and never leaves us. Today we lay aside the anxieties that trouble us, and we fix our eyes on You. We trust You to complete what You promised for our lives. In Jesus’ name, amen.

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Nikki Sealey works as the Communications Director for Compassion UK.

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1 Comment |Add a comment

  1. Mike Stephens August 1, 2012

    Nikki thank you so much for this post! It’s bold to say “don’t give up!” I wish I would be in London in a few days competing in the triathlon in the Olympic Games, but I am not. “I miscarried on my training and preparation and discipline.”

    But the Rio de Janeiro Olympics are still 4 years away and hopefully I will give birth to a gold medal in the triathlon, even if I don’t your post encouraged me! And I’m going to try day by day and workout by workout to win 😉

    Romans 14:7-8

    Amplified Bible (AMP)

    7 None of us lives to himself [but to the Lord], and none of us dies to himself [but to the Lord, for]

    8 If we live, we live to the Lord, and if we die, we die to the Lord. So then, whether we live or we die, we belong to the Lord.

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