one word to lead

Time used to dance slowly for me.

I remember my creeping countdown to Christmas break. Spring break. Summer. The beginning of our lives was marked with seasons broken up for us, with rest.

Then there was college and marriage and all the responsibility that piles itself high. It feels like a new kind of time that believes you’ve exchanged wonder for a number. An age.

I’m wide eyed in disbelief that it is almost 2015.

This year, I’ve told too many people that I am 26. When in fact, I turned 30.

Somewhere along the line, time stopped for me. Somewhere around 26. Right when I got married. Right when my life stood at the precipice of incomprehensible bliss and heartbreaking burdens.

Right before the world started to really dig in and tell me what path I needed to follow. To whisper who it thought I was.

Maybe you’re weary too? Maybe you’re also recounting lost days and moments in your mind. How is the new year almost here?

Rest always comes when I sit with the One who created time. His patient presence. His sing-song consistency. Always there. Always.

So I sat with Him and we talked about 2015. About my heavy heart and my wild childlike dreams. About His love that just won’t stop and His grace that has caught me an embarrassing amount of times.

We talked about our word to lead me for 2015. And when He revealed it to me I thought, “Yes!” and, “No.”
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